Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Ecclesiastes 10:12-20 (Devotion)

"The words of a wise man's mouth win him favor, but the lips of a fool consume him. The beginning of the words of his mouth is foolishness, and the end of his talk is evil madness. A fool multiplies words, though no man knows what is to be, and who can tell him what will be after him? The toil of a fool wearies him, for he does not know the way to the city. Woe to you, O land, when your king is a child, and your princes feast in the morning! Happy are you, O land, when your king is the son of the nobility, and your princes feast at the proper time, for strength, and not for drunkenness! Through sloth the roof sinks in, and through indolence the house leaks. Bread is made for laughter, and wine gladdens life, and money answers everything. Even in your thoughts, do not curse the king, nor in your bedroom curse the rich, for a bird of the air will carry your voice, or some winged creature tell the matter."

In part #2 of Ecclesiastes 10, we continue to discover more nuggets of truth Solomon uses to distinguish wisdom from foolishness, beginning with our words. No doubt, many of us can empathize with how easily our tongues dig a hole for ourselves or diminish others' opinions of how self-controlled and mature we are in our thoughts and behavior. When we choose our words wisely, we win favor with others because we speak graciously. We implement discretion to filter out fleshly motivations that are inconsistent with God's Word because "the lips of the righteous know what is acceptable, but the mouth of the wicked, what is perverse" (Proverbs 10:32). We carefully consider both the immediate and long-term impact of not only what we say but how we say it, so that we draw others unto Christ rather than drive them away based on our behavior. Scripture reminds us, "Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person" (Colossians 4:6), because our speech sets the tone for how we apply our faith in action. We cannot proclaim our identity as Christians then live as we please without the slightest regard for how we apply Biblical truth. No, we must determine our tongues are guarded to ensure we are conveying wisdom to others rather than folly. For as James admonishes, "If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless" (James 1:26).

The antithesis of speaking wisely is allowing our words to remain unfiltered and unapologetic. Solomon points out that both the beginning and end of a fool's speech are insignificant and essentially madness because there is no limit to how long he will continue talking without discretion. A fool does not recognize that "when words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent" (Proverbs 10:19). Therefore, it is imperative we recognize how susceptible we have become to adopting foolish behavior by how we allow our tongues to remain unbridled/unrestrained. It is incredible to consider how much damage we can inflict when our tongues remain untamed. "So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell" (James 3:5-6). It is typically those we are closest to (such as our spouses and children) who endure the wrath of our careless words. Therefore, if we desire to know our greatest weaknesses in how we communicate, we must humble ourselves and allow those we love open forum to speak truth into our hearts without getting defensive or making excuses for our foolish behavior.

Solomon also highlights incompetence and a know-it-all attitude as attributes a fool communicates. Great frustration is often felt by those who endure the foolishness of a man who thinks he knows but it utterly clueless. Rather than humble himself and seek wise counsel and expertise, a fool remains prideful, independent and isolated from allowing knowledge and understanding to penetrate his heart. Why? The Bible proclaims, "Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him" (Proverbs 22:15), yet how many of us to this day still speak our minds with childlike ignorance to the consequences of our actions? It is utter foolishness to speak without a filter or moral compass which are God's provision to guide us toward righteousness and protect us from living in the flesh. Therefore, we must shift our focus and begin praying daily: "Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!" (Psalm 139:23-24). Only then will be begin to see the selfish impurities dispersed throughout the fabric of our lives which require the refiner's fire to cleanse and purify us from the inside out.

Self-indulgence is another theme Solomon makes no qualms addressing pointedly. The illusion that consistent and regular consumption of any substance is not addictive in nature is foolish. Solomon addresses alcohol as the drug of choice a fool consumes without discretion, but we can easily peer into the dark caverns of our own hearts and realize that we are creatures of nature and repetition breeds temptation when the object of our desire is idolatrous. In other words, when something or someone other than God consumes my desires, I will serve that which has the strongest influence in my heart. God's Word teaches, "What profit is an idol when its maker has shaped it, a metal image, a teacher of lies? For its maker trusts in his own creation when he makes speechless idols! Woe to him who says to a wooden thing, Awake; to a silent stone, Arise! Can this teach? Behold, it is overlaid with gold and silver, and there is no breath at all in it. But the LORD is in his holy temple; let all the earth keep silence before him" (Habakkuk 2:18-20). Let us be clear: If we cannot live without someone or something, we have created an idol in our hearts that wages war against the Spirit of the Living God who dwells within us. And if we wonder whether we personally struggle with over-indulgence or idolatrous thinking, we can simply abstain from the object of our desire for a consistent period of time and monitor our behavior accordingly. Withdrawal is a powerful temperature gauge for providing clear warning that addictive behavior and idolatry are present.

Finally, two truths must be flushed out concerning Solomon's final words. First, the notion that money answers everything is Solomon's way of acknowledging that life here on earth is economical. In most cases, currency is required to pay for goods and services essential for survival and compensation is reward for man's labor that enables him to provide for the needs of his family. In this sense, money is not inherently evil in any way. Where Scripture does draw a line of distinction pertains to our heart's attitude regarding money. "No servant can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money" (Luke 16:13). Why is this so critical to emphasize? "Because those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs" (1 Timothy 6:9-10)

Second, Solomon reminds us that even though we are wise to guard the words that come out of our mouths, we must recognize that words spoken in secret are just as dangerous as what we boldly proclaim without hesitation in public. We must remember that although the intentions of our hearts may be private and concealed from others, the Lord knows our every thought and motivation. "O LORD, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O LORD, you know it altogether" (Psalm 139:1-4). Knowing this truth, we can better understand why Scripture emphatically warns, "Woe to those who devise wickedness and work evil on their beds! When the morning dawns, they perform it, because it is in the power of their hand" (Micah 2:1). Therefore, the choice is ours to make. If we are followers of Christ, we are not slaves to our flesh but born of the Spirit because we can choose to cast off foolish thinking and embrace wisdom. And the power to choose is a gift of free will the Lord offers to us all, no matter our race, age, ethnicity, gender or economic status.  

Friday, August 19, 2016

Ecclesiastes 10:1-11 (Devotion)

"Dead flies make the perfumer's ointment give off a stench; so a little folly outweighs wisdom and honor. A wise man's heart inclines him to the right, but a fool's heart to the left. Even when the fool walks on the road, he lacks sense, and he says to everyone that he is a fool. If the anger of the ruler rises against you, do not leave your place, for calmness will lay great offenses to rest. There is an evil that I have seen under the sun, as it were an error proceeding from the ruler: folly is set in many high places, and the rich sit in a low place. I have seen slaves on horses, and princes walking on the ground like slaves. He who digs a pit will fall into it, and a serpent will bite him who breaks through a wall. He who quarries stones is hurt by them, and he who splits logs is endangered by them. If the iron is blunt, and one does not sharpen the edge, he must use more strength, but wisdom helps one to succeed. If the serpent bites before it is charmed, there is no advantage to the charmer."

There are times when the words of Scripture are like a handful of mixed nuts consumed individually or as a whole. Like the book of Proverbs, Solomon wrote a myriad of sayings and nuggets of truth we can consume at our leisure regardless of the slight variation of taste each verse may have. Overall, Solomon conveys the same central theme of distinguishing wisdom from foolishness by not only exploiting their differences but identifying the detrimental influence folly has upon wisdom. Verse 1 sets the tone providing an easy example anyone can relate to, as anything dead will begin to rot and decompose if not disposed of properly. The metaphor of perfume (wisdom) and dead flies (folly) allows us to experience through our senses that folly and wisdom do not mix. Foolishness exudes an unpleasant stench that cannot be ignored, and thus we are wise to ensure our foolish thinking and behavior do not spoil the sweet aroma and taste of wisdom we long to possess. "My son, eat honey, for it is good, and the drippings of the honeycomb are sweet to your taste. Know that wisdom is such to your soul; if you find it, there will be a future, and your hope will not be cut off" (Proverbs 24:13-14).

Wisdom and folly impact the direction our hearts gravitate toward as well. Because wisdom and foolishness are polar opposites, they force us to make decisions each day which guide and direct our path. We are always presented with forks in the road regardless of our spiritual maturity or length of time as followers of Christ, but we have the choice to determine our final destination (right or left). Yet it is undeniably true as Solomon conveys that those who practice foolishness typically are unashamed in declaring to those around them (whether directly or indirectly) that they are proud of their actions. That is why Scripture reminds us, "Doing wrong is like a joke to a fool, but wisdom is pleasure to a man of understanding" (Proverbs 10:23). There is also wisdom is remaining calm under pressure and not panicking. Unbridled emotion can be an incredible example of foolishness because it demonstrates lack of self-control in the face of adversity. Rather than taking a mature approach, the fool reacts rather than responds to the situation he/she is in. Therefore, it is far better to remain calm as Solomon encourages, for great offenses are resolved when emotions are kept in check. "Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God" (James 1:19-20).

Sadly, it appears Solomon's vision of folly being exalted is increasingly becoming the norm in our culture today. The evil he refers to reflects a state of chaos and anarchy where wise living is cast aside and foolish behavior is both encouraged and applauded. It is sobering to acknowledge how quickly the United States has turned away from the Biblical principles our nation was founded upon. For any semblance of Christianity is increasingly being squeezed out of government, schools, businesses, etc., and branded as irrelevant and outdated, or simply accused as being judgmental, intolerant and hate-speech by those who passionately oppose the Bible. Yet as Christians we are called to abide by a different set of rules: "Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted" (Matthew 23:12). Therefore, we cannot react but only respond in love just as our Lord and Savior demonstrated for us when He was persecuted for standing unashamed on Scriptural truth and exalting wisdom over foolish and debased thinking. "If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you" (John 15:18-19).

We cannot ignore the basic cause and effect principles of foolishness either. Solomon conveys various examples where a fool digs a pit and falls in, breaks through a wall and is bitten by a snake, labors in a stone quarry or with timber and suffers injury as a result. In each example, the potential for accidents is exponentially increased because wisdom is not being used. For why would a man dig a pit and then immediately fall in it? Scripture reminds us, "The lips of the righteous feed many, but fools die for lack of sense" (Proverbs 10:21), which should remind us that "good sense is a fountain of life to him who has it, but the instruction of fools is folly" (Proverbs 16:22). Solomon continues to press the issue though, commenting that a dull blade adds insult to injury and forces more effort than is needed to the one who foolishly continues to use it. The parallel to our spiritual lives in this example simply cannot be missed as the act of sharpening a blade is an accurate metaphor for true accountability in the life of a Christ-follower. The popular verse, "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another" (Proverbs 27:17) teaches there is infinite wisdom in sharpening our character and countenance upon the grindstone of God's Word in community with fellow Christians. For we are fools if we believe our behavior will reflect wisdom, blessing and righteousness if left dull by laziness, indifference, and a lack of common sense. We need truth and Biblical accountability with our brethren if we're to avoid foolish thinking and behavior.

The advantage we seek by bathing our minds in the water of God's Word is recognition of who we are as Christ-followers. For if we're spiritually blind to our blindness, we will continue to foolishly walk with no direction in mind, oblivious to the dangers along our path. We simply cannot live without recognizing our weaknesses, fleshly propensities, and even areas of strength that our enemy seeks to exploit at all cost. The risk of losing our spiritual compass is too great a burden to bear. Therefore, we must turn the tables as Christians; not merely keeping in mind the immense differences between wisdom and folly and understanding that folly can easily spoil wisdom, but using wisdom God has graciously given us to influence foolishness for righteousness. Scripture teaches, "Wisdom rests in the heart of a man of understanding, but it makes itself known even in the midst of fools" (Proverbs 14:33). This truth magnifies the power and impact wisdom has even in the midst of folly. It exposes folly as insignificant and elevates wisdom as a priceless commodity reserved for those who trust in God's sovereignty rather than man's severely limited, fleshly capacities. More importantly, it provides an opportunity for influencing others to turn from their foolish ways and embrace the truth of the Gospel that frees man from his fleshly thinking and behavior. For in the end, our goal is sanctification and the belief that God will reward us when we cast off foolishness from our hearts and embrace the truth of Scripture as our fountain of wisdom and understanding. Therefore, let us rest in the security of God's Word which declares, "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction" (Proverbs 1:7).

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Ecclesiastes 9:11-18 (Devotion)

WISDOM BETTER THAN FOLLY - "Again I saw that under the sun the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, nor bread to the wise, nor riches to the intelligent, nor favor to those with knowledge, but time and chance happen to them all. For man does not know his time. Like fish that are taken in an evil net, and like birds that are caught in a snare, so the children of man are snared at an evil time, when it suddenly falls upon them. I have also seen this example of wisdom under the sun, and it seemed great to me. There was a little city with few men in it, and a great king came against it and besieged it, building great siege-works against it. But there was found in it a poor, wise man, and he by his wisdom delivered the city. Yet no one remembered that poor man. But I say that wisdom is better than might, though the poor man's wisdom is despised and his words are not heard. The words of the wise heard in quiet are better than the shouting of a ruler among fools. Wisdom is better than weapons of war, but one sinner destroys much good."

There are no guarantees in life! No matter how hard we try to shape the trajectory of our future by the decisions we make in the present, the fact remains that our knowledge is limited. We cannot predict our final hour, the manner in which we will pass from this life, nor the reasons behind God's decision to end our days here on earth. What we can determine though is how spiritually prepared we will be when that moment arrives. Solomon previously emphasized, "All go to one place. All are from the dust, and to dust all return" (Ecclesiastes 3:20) to remind us that we are mortal. Therefore, it is imperative we make the most of the time we have been given to ensure that when our day of reckoning comes, we will be prepared to meet our Maker. For none of us who profess saving faith in Jesus Christ desire to stand before God on judgment day overcome with guilt and shame for the sinful choices we have made. We would rather proclaim to our Creator in humble confidence, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith" (2 Timothy 4:7). This mindset does not presume we won't have regrets over poor decisions or how we failed to maximize every moment in our possession. It simply means we will not be held captive by our past, for we recognize that our salvation has been made secure by Christ and our identity as God's chosen people sealed for eternity.

Understanding what it means to be "saved" is of utmost importance when considering Solomon's words because our identity is found in Christ. No doubt, many of us have experienced firsthand the harsh realities of prejudice, injustice and unfair balances in our lifetime. Perhaps our gifts or talents have not been recognized or valued by others but persecuted and ridiculed by those who are threatened by or jealous of what God has freely bestowed on us. As Christians, we identify with the words of King David who proclaimed, "I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well" (Psalm 139:14). Again, this perspective reminds us as Christians that our identity is linked with Christ when we surrender our personal will and relinquish ultimate control for God to use us as He wills. We trade worldly uncertainty for God's sovereignty and accept the fate which He chooses for our lives because we trust His ways are greater than our own. Of course, this does not assume we deserve to prosper in any area of life. At times, God chooses to take away any advantage we may have just as Solomon alludes to regarding the swift, the strong, the wise or the intelligent. In those instances, we must accept His sovereignty for better or worse because we know as God's people that all things come to fruition in His way and His time for His purposes and His glory. "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope'" (Jeremiah 29:11).

However, another truth remains regarding the swift, strong, wise and intelligent that we cannot gloss over if we desire to understand Solomon's perspective in this passage: Humility. "Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted" (Matthew 23:12)We assume that the fastest, strongest and smartest will excel in life (and most often they do), but there are also instances when people with far less surpass those with tremendous capabilities, aptitude and resources. Solomon provides one such example: Despite overwhelming strength, a great king could not besiege a small city protected by a few men with a poor, wise leader at the helm. Strength and power were not enough to succeed against meager opposition because humility was lacking in the king who was supposed to excel and succeed. This truth forces us to reevaluate our perspective regarding how we personally think and act, for how often do we encounter situations and pull out wisdom as our tool of choice rather than speed, strength or knowledge? Perhaps it is because wisdom requires humility to set aside pride and seek the Lord as the source of wisdom rather than ourselves. For as James reminds us, "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him" (James 1:5)

When we relinquish selfish control and allow the Lord to equip us with wisdom rather than any other quality we think we need to succeed, we begin to understand why Scripture declares, "Blessed is the one who finds wisdom, and the one who gets understanding, for the gain from her is better than gain from silver and her profit better than gold. She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her" (Proverbs 3:13-15). Wisdom does not need a megaphone to amplify its importance. Its value and significance are perfected in those who quietly apply it rather than pridefully shout to others that they possess it. "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall" (Proverbs 16:18). The proof is in application, which again forces us to reevaluate our lives and calibrate our decision-making to ensure they are consistent with God's Word. Surface Christianity is simply not sufficient. Our actions must provide testimony to our identity in Christ which begins with Biblical application and testifies to an attainment of wisdom that elicits such behavior. "So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead" (James 2:17).

Bottom-line, no matter if we are blessed with plenty or challenged with little, our perspective must be that God's sovereignty reigns supreme in whatever lot he provides us. For above all, the most important gift we are given is His grace that supersedes any limitations, struggles or trials we endure in our lives. Even more, we are exhorted by the example of the apostle Paul that temptations abound when spiritual warfare increases. Paul suffered greatly for the advancement of the Gospel, but his wise counsel still ministers to us more than ever as we face our own personal smorgasbord of sinful opportunities the world tempts us with. Therefore, it is imperative we remember Paul's personal testimony to encourage us when the wisdom road seems too narrow for us to walk and sinful, alternative routes tempt us to destroy the good work Christ has done in our hearts. "But the Lord said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong" (2 Corinthians 12:9-10)

Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Ecclesiastes 9:7-10 (Devotion)

ENJOY LIFE WITH THE ONE YOU LOVE - "Go, eat your bread with joy, and drink your wine with a merry heart, for God has already approved what you do. Let your garments be always white. Let not oil be lacking on your head. Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life that he has given you under the sun, because that is your portion in life and in your toil at which you toil under the sun. Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might, for there is no work or thought or knowledge or wisdom in Sheol, to which you are going."

It is important to ensure that as Christians we never take God's Word out of context or misinterpret its meaning. We must  always look back to ensure we grasp the significance of wherever we find ourselves in Scripture, for the opportunities God places before us at every turn are limitless especially in the construct of time as it relates to our lives. Who we WERE directly impacts who we ARE for better or worse. Therefore, if we are to glean the wisdom Solomon conveys in verses 7-10, we must first reflect upon what he said directly preceding it. Yes, we are to enjoy life with the ones we love (v. 7-10), but we are to do so recognizing our mortality (v. 1-6) and how quality time plays a critical role in our search for peace, happiness, tranquility and significance. In truth, the bigger question is identifying what motivates our thinking and behavior more than the object of our affection and desire. Jesus said, "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also," (Matthew 6:21) and we are wise to understand that motivation is key to discerning whether we are held captive by worldly perspective or Godly perspective.

Let us be clear: There is nothing wrong with desiring to be happy. God desires for His children to rejoice in the fruit of the spirit He offers freely to those who trust in His Word and identify themselves as born-again. "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law" (Galatians 5:22-23). That is why Solomon encourages us to enjoy life with those we love, especially as men whose wives submit to our headship in marriage unto Christ. Submission is an incredible gift we are given by our wives, and we cannot diminish that choice in any way for it is compelled in love and obedience to Scripture when relinquished without hesitation. That does not assume we are worthy to receive such an honor because Christ is the only husband our wives should submit to. As husbands, we are simply the vessels our wives submit THROUGH as they submit to Scriptural authority. Let us also be clear though that happiness is not the ultimate pursuit we are to focus our time and efforts toward. Sanctification trumps happiness in God's economy, therefore we cannot become susceptible to feeling we deserve to be happy in our marriages when trials and conflict arise and "exit stage left" is readily available. No, we must hold firm to our marital covenant and not confuse our desire to be happy as a need that will never come to fruition as our flesh demands. "For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God" (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5).

Solomon admonishes that in order to receive the full blessing of happiness, we are to wear garments of white with heads covered in oil. The brushstrokes painted here offer us a glimpse of righteousness we are to seek after. That begins by recognizing our sinful shortcomings and seeking forgiveness through genuine, Biblical repentance. Again, that does not pin us down under the weight of guilt, shame and regret, but it does magnify the chasm of despair that exists between fleshly living and Godly character. The apostle Paul wrote, "Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God" (1 Corinthians 6:9-11). The key takeaway is that while we all struggle with sin and temptation, those of us who have accepted Christ as Lord and Savior and been born-again are not subject to obey what comes natural in the world. We can choose to resist evil and live for Christ, and thus cover our heads with the oil of sanctification and put on garments of white that have been washed by the blood of the lamb for our salvation.

Time is critical though. We cannot take for granted that tomorrow is guaranteed. Therefore, spending quality time with our spouses and children is paramount because they are our true prize at the end of each working day. Typically, we look at our paycheck as the reward for employment, but Solomon conveys a different message we need to recognize. For how many of us considered this passage of Ecclesiastes when we committed our vows? More importantly, how many of us are now convicted that we have squandered so many years of our marriages because we focused on areas of discontentment rather than enjoying the blessing of our marital covenant? This perspective opens our eyes to fresh wisdom conveyed in Scripture as well. "Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered" (1 Peter 3:7). Bottom-line, when we shift our focus toward the blessings God gives through quality time with our loved ones, we begin to understand that seeking to understand replaces confrontation, and showing honor elevates mutual respect and admiration.

Finally, Solomon exhorts that whatever we do should be done with all our might. Likewise, Paul wrote, "And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him" (Colossians 3:17). In either case, the message of a dedicated and determined effort is made to emphasize how important diligence and discipline are in the pursuit of happiness and contentment. For what man can be content in his marriage if he is not fully engaged but lazy, indifferent and lackadaisical toward his wife? A halfhearted effort will result in diminishing returns if consistent over time and tempt a man to flee his marriage rather than fight for it. This simply cannot be! Divorce has become the popular choice many have chosen rather than working toward reconciliation and healing through Biblical counseling. However, there is another option and Solomon exhorts us to believe in the power of grace and mercy through the Holy Spirit that empowers us as followers of Christ to change course and enjoy life with those we love. Opportunities will undoubtedly arise in our marriages to flee when conflict abounds and temptations to justify sin seem rational. But to those who persevere in the face of danger, infinite blessing awaits. The question is whether we will embrace the lot we have been given or turn away from the refiner's fire that purifies our hearts and allows us to love our spouses as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up unto death for His bride. "Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God" (Ephesians 5:1-2).